I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
