I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize