So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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