U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
