You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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