thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
