I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
