His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
