I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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