we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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