AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
