I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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