You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
