No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
