On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
