He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
that is very illegal...i love you.
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