honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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