hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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