i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
