Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
