I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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