maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
farters have to be the big spoon...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize