your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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