Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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