After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
