Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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