i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
