he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
