is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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