I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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