so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
this is an emotional support booty call
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
