she was so not down for the gang bang
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
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