I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
