Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
