Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
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