I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize