my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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