is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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