He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Couch. On fire.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
