Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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