note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
