After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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