I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Me. At least after what I've been through.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
