Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
