i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
