Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
