I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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