only if we run a train.
done.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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