i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
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