Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
