we should wear snuggies to the strip club
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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